So… The big, scary, intimidating yet often overused word of ANXIETY. In this day and age it seems as though everyone has anxiety, yet it doesn’t get talked about, normalised or accepted enough.
In this series of blog posts I’m going to talk to you guys about my experiences of having anxiety, and how I’ve ‘cured’ myself in a sense. I truly do feel like a better person for it, and although counselling is an amazing option and should be considered you don’t necessarily need it. In the advice that I give, and the support we can give each other in the comments or over email, we’re going to make you into the best version of yourself you can possibly be!
So as I’ve mentioned to you all previously I have in the recent year suffered from anxiety which spiralled into a form of depression for me. If you met me now you would never guess it, and this is the problem with mental health, people don’t see past what you give them on the exterior. Even in my worst most darkest periods I continued to keep up the smile even though I was broken on the inside, it’s why I call myself the Broken Pearl because we all have our cracks and flaws and that’s what makes us beautiful.
For me my anxiety was a subconscious thing for many years, looking back to when I was as young as 10 I would have panic attacks in the middle of lessons. The feeling of my lungs filling up with water, sweating, struggling to breathe, while somehow remaining that calm exterior, convincing myself this was normal and that it wasn’t something I should be concerned about. This is the problem, there isn’t enough recognition for mental health, if I had known from that age that this was anxiety I could have prevented rather than had the trouble of curing my really bad anxiety in my early adult-hood!
The first step to over-coming anxiety is not allowing yourself to be ignorant to it, it’s about having the awareness that you may need help and that this is something that needs to be fixed in a sense. However, your anxiety does not have to be a negative, it does not make you a broken person. As I said earlier when I related us all to broken pearls, our cracks aren’t flaws they make us into our perfect beautiful selves, you can make your anxiety into a positive.
Fuck it, I’m grateful for the fact I have and have had severe anxiety. There I said it. For me my anxiety has been a turning point in my life, it was a wake up call that I was on the wrong track and it turned me around, re-awakening me to new joys and a new perspective on life. I truly believe a third eye for me was opened through my anxiety, and I became connected to my spirituality. I will forever be grateful for that, and you will be too, the moment you recognise your anxiety and give into it, accept it, is the moment everything changes.
All my love,
The Broken Pearl