Hopping on the roller coaster that only goes up

Good evening beautiful world and welcome back to my blog! It’s been a while and all I can ask is that you’re forgiving of me, since I did start a new job recently and finding a new routine has been a little tricky at times.

It’s all about maintaining a balance, am I right? I mean in my opinion that’s the most important thing, to have a work/ life balance. For me right now my work is not my life, one day I hope it is, I hope my work is something I enjoy so much I don’t even consider it a job. I won’t stop working until I get there, but for now, I must keep my head screwed on and held high.

How do I do that? I motivate myself every day, and I honestly feel like a morning routine plays such a huge part in this for me.

Don’t get me wrong like I do enjoy my job, everyone has the off day where perhaps things didn’t go too well, or you’re super sleepy as you’ve had a rough night so the day ahead may seem like a huge milestone to overcome, but you shouldn’t HATE your job. That’s super important too, if you’re job is the reason for your lowness, change it. Simple.

You may think- that’s a huge risk… but in reality it’s an even bigger risk to stay in that job and risk being miserable for more years than you would have to be.

I motivate myself daily to do the best I can and keep my goals in sight, because I know exactly where I want to be in 10 years time. Hell yeah I’ve wrote a mantra that describes how my life will be and it bloody well will because I’ve told myself it will. When I really want something, I don’t stop until I get it, that’s my mentality.

Whenever I’m feeling low or super down, my anxiety rises and I start on the negative thoughts about my life, my job, the ‘am I doing the right thing?’ questions arise. I could quite easily get swamped, but every time I can pull myself out of that by recentering. How do I do that?

Writing. I honestly think it’s the biggest thing for me staying focused. By writing down negative thoughts and turning them into positives, motivating yourself on paper you will start to see the lack of logic in how you’re thinking. So often when we’re getting low our thoughts are irrational and don’t make sense, yet we still manage to convince ourselves they’re reigning truths!

That’s your ego talking, that’s your lower self scaring you into submission because it thinks its ‘looking after you.’ By searching for rationality and seeing sense you are so much more likely to connect to your higher self. Writing for me is a blessing.

You know I’m ranting away on here like a mad woman because I feel like I have so much to tell you guys, because I freaking love to write.

Find something you truly love, something that’ll open your mind to wider possibilties and cancel out that lower voice in your head. For me, especially in a time in my life where I’m vulnerable to negativity- because starting a new job is never easy, I need to connect to my higher self to stay motivated.

If this is you too, I believe in you, you’ve got this!!! Keep your head high folks, and take your seat on the roller coaster that only goes up.

All my love,

HG

Making Judgements

So after a bit of a tiring week (since I started a new job), which I am super proud of myself for getting… I didn’t really know what to write about. I’ve been absorbing so much new information that my brain has just been overloaded, but in a good way, I love learning new things and being challenged so for me this is really cool. After going on a run this evening something suddenly clicked for me, I wasn’t even particularly thinking about it but it makes sense to write about.

See when I was job searching I struggled because I know I’m an intelligent individual with tons of potential, yet a lack of degree and experience in the necessary fields… Therefore I struggled to accept that I might have to start from the bottom and work my way up career wise. Butttttttttt, there’s nothing at all wrong with that.

My point is, is that I was judging myself for not starting my dream job immediately. So that’s what this post is about, I think the trouble is, some of us (and I know it can’t just be me) are so hard on ourselves and hard on other people because we are too judgmental about a situation that we are currently in that we end up producing this negative energy (which by the way doesn’t look good on anyone who wears it).

By observing everything with optimism, and positivity we automatically start being easier on ourselves too. What I’m trying to say is to stop judging other people and you will in turn stop judging yourself. If you laugh at an overweight person with your friends as you walk past them in the street chances are you look at yourself in the mirror and claim how ‘fat’ you are. Your insecurities reflect in how you perceive other people, and it just creates such negativity.

The moment I stopped judging myself for starting up in a career that I knew I didn’t want to do for life, just; something to get me going, a foot in the door of an amazing company with endless opportunities the Universe granted me with that something.

Am I making any sense? I hope so, I tend to type at the speed of my mind, and that runs pretty fast sometimes!

“Stop judging other people and you will stop judging yourself.”

Making your mentality so much more healthy, and making you more of an attractive person to other people! Try it for a day, challenge yourself to be more open minded, not closed off with judgements on why people are the way they are or look the way the look. That’s not for you to judge. Be positive and sympathetic, and great things will follow.

All my love,

HG

Over-coming anxiety- part 5

Hello beautiful world, this is the final post I will be making on over-coming anxiety but if you want more posts like this just let me know in the comment section down below! I’ve been feeling very motivated recently, if you’ve read my last post you’d understand that I’m slowly coming to terms with living with uncertainty and not always having a plan. I just think that by putting all our hopes and dreams into one plan, one direction, if we come across bumps in the road or things don’t go as they ‘should have’ we get dissapointed and more sad than we should do. Personally I think that this was always part of the problem with my own anxiety, my awareness that this may be something I should work on has helped considerably in a recovery from something that got me down more than I realised at first.

So this final post is all about ensuring you’re loving yourself, and that you allow yourself the time you need to heal yourself. The process isn’t going to be over-night, and you will have your wobbles every now and then, but overall you’ll be a better person mentally and physically. Healing anxiety isn’t just about improving mental health, it’s about following your soul and changing your lifestyle for the better. It’s the reason I’m partly against taking medication for it, because in my opinion that’s more of a quick fix, instant help, that won’t heal you internally but give the false impression that you’re doing good. Of course if you’re really struggling and medication is what you need I encourage that! But in order to help yourself in the long-term you need to start getting honest with yourself, dig deep to discover where all this is stemming from, what is laying in your subconscious that is making you anxious?

Over-coming anxiety will be a steady process, and you’ll find a few hurdles along the way that may distract you from your end goal. The most important thing is not to fall and stay down. You pick yourself up every single freaking time and dust yourself off, keep moving, keep progressing, because that’s life! Life will throw hurdles at you, whether it’s in work or personal stuff, it’s going to happen, but you can’t use that as an exuse to stop the process of bettering yourself.

It’s like my breakup—- in case you didn’t realise this is what my The Broken Pearl blog post is about. That was a major hurdle for me, I was the one who did the breaking up but that didn’t make it much easier for me. I know I did the right thing, and I’m still glad I did it, I have no regrets. I gave myself 3 days to mourn and not do much at all, after that I had to start being productive again, and I stuck to it. Don’t wallow in pity and negativity, pick yourself up from that shit because you’re so much better than that. Allow yourself time, set a date when you need to get back on track and stick with it.

Have faith in yourself, if you’re not all for it it’s only going to make it harder for you. Believe you’ll overcome it and you will. I’m a firm believer in the Law of Attraction, the energy you put out to the world you receive. The way I envision it is, when you’re in a good mood and radiating good energy you have on a pair of glasses with lenses which only allow you to see love, colour and positivity. If you’re in a bad mood the negative spectacles come on and that’s all you’ll see… The thing we all forget is that we can change those glasses whenever we like you just have to change your perspective, change your mood, the world is only what you make it. Life is the dancer and you are the dance. Never forget that.

This is the post for you to come back to when you need to become motivated again, because you may need it. If I can do it you sure can, I beleive in youuuuuuuu. Let the journey commense.

All my love,

The Broken Pearl

Over-coming anxiety- part 4

Hello beautiful people, how have you all been? Being out of my routines for so long has left me feeling rather de-motivated and lazy to be honest, and that resulted in me not feeling so good in myself. Today I’ve started a project come back for myself, I went over all the goals I have made for this year and revised how I was going to make them happen, the short-term and the long-term. Since we’re over halfway through the year I would highly encourage this of everyone, go over your resolutions or goals for this year and go over how you’re going to make that happen. It’s super important to stay focused, never lose sight of what you desire.

This all ties into the topic for my fourth post on over-coming anxiety which is staying commited to the routines and little things which help motivate and inspire you, the things that help create a positive mindset for yourself and create a forcefield for negative thoughts and emotions.

We all break routines from time to time and this is normal, it’s also important to remember not to be too hard on yourself if you’re not up for meditating or couldn’t find the time to exercise on one of the 7 days in the week. Being too strict with yourself will only result in these things becoming a chore for you, not things that actually help and relieve you from a troubled mind.

For me my routine includes waking up and not allowing myself to go on my phone for at least an hour. By waking up and immediatly looking at what other people are doing instead of prioritising what you could be doing with yourself, will only distract you from any goals or things you want to get done in the day. Writing a list of things to get done in the day and then writing down how I’m feeling and resolving any problems in my journal is what keeps me focused and positive throughout the day. In immediatly dealing with or emptying you mind of worry in the morning, you are more likely to have a more fulfilled and positive day, as you’re essentially losing the burden of carrying around stress with you.

I can’t emphasise enough in how having a positive mental attitude can change and releive you of anxiety and low mood. Lifestyle change is just as beneficial, becoming more active and eating for wellness and health will naturally help too. But in building a routine of little things such as meditating or going on a daily morning walk which helps calm your mind and ground you will gradually cause improvements with your self-esteem and a decrease in an anxious mind.

Try it out, find out what works for you, write down the routine so that it’s set in stone, try it for 2 weeks, write daily and notice the change and improvements by reflecting back in your journal.

Something I should do more of is reading jounral entries from months ago, sometimes I forget how far I have come with my anxiety. It’s humbling to have been somewhere so dark and low, it makes everything else, any improvement, a day of positivity and love 100X more exciting and I have so much more gratitude for the smaller things. Although we all think our anxiety is a burden from time to time, it makes us ensightful to the smaller things, opening our eyes and finding enjoyment and gratitude in things that would be overlooked by most.

Remember this is a jounrey, don’t expect immediate results, be kind to yourself and be patient. You’ve got this.

All my love,

The Broken Pearl

Over-coming anxiety part 3

I just wanted to start this post by saying that although you may perceive this series as a sign that I’m 100% clear of anxiety this is not the case, and that’s normal. Your anxiety makes you who you are and sometimes it may pop up to say hello. It’s just learning to manage it and control it, it’s important not to fear your anxiety but treat it as a part of you, remember it doesn’t have to be a negative. Travelling to South Africa last week was rather hard for me I’m not going to lie to you guys, I had a bit of a panic on my second plane journey and as soon as I got here had a mini panic about making friends and did experience a wave of anxiety for a couple of days.
Obviously it’s hard and it’s frustrating because I’ve come so far you know, I’m a changed person to how I was a few months ago and all it takes is for me to be 5,000 miles from home, on my own and I start to forget everything I’ve taught myself. 

This is why having routines and understanding yourself comes into play, all you need is a few things that you can do that will help ground you to the present. I find that the reason I get anxious or low is because I look ahead too far into the future, and forget to appreciate the present moment. Living and breathing the present is so freaking important! I preach it. As cliché as it may sound I find that this is one of the biggest ways of overcoming anxiety, and you can help yourself do this in various ways, all it takes is a bit of experimenting and time and eventually you’ll be an expert at mastering gratitude for the present moment. 

This may all sound a little mad, but I find that it has helped me considerably, even if you don’t have anxiety this is something we should all work on! So often we forget to appreciate everything happening around us now, because we’re either thinking ahead or we’re sucked into our phone screens becoming caught up in other people’s lives rather than our own!

So these are the tricks I have learnt to help become present: MEDITATION- I will always swear by meditation, even though I may not do it every day I know that by quietening your mind you will cut that thought process of worry and far-thinking and this will help ground you to the present. 
BEING OUTSIDE- I know this may sound silly but in being outside you get to appreciate more, and distract your mind, fresh air is also really good for clearing your head. Being in an enclosed room by yourself will only worsen your anxiety, get yourself outside, go for a walk and appreciate your surroundings.
FOCUS ON YOUR BREATH- again it may sound silly but simply closing your eyes and focusing on your breath will again help break the thought process of overthinking, you can seek gratitude for the health of your body and the air that you breathe. I’m not crazy I swear, it’s just the little things that can help you out here!
START WRITING A GRATITUDE JOURNAL- this will seriously help you, because writing a list of at least 3 things in the day that you’re grateful for will help ground your throughout the day, because you’ll be paying attention to the little things that make your day such as a smile from a stranger or appreciation for the book you’re reading. 

Of course you can come up with your own ways of becoming grounded and present, these are just my own personal ways of finding appreciation and calming my mind. I hope you’re all having an amazing morning, afternoon, evening or night wherever you are in the world! I’ll be back again with another post about South Africa towards the end of this week.

All my love,
HG 
(The Broken Pearl )

Over-coming anxiety: Part 1

So… The big, scary, intimidating yet often overused word of ANXIETY. In this day and age it seems as though everyone has anxiety, yet it doesn’t get talked about, normalised or accepted enough.

In this series of blog posts I’m going to talk to you guys about my experiences of having anxiety, and how I’ve ‘cured’ myself in a sense. I truly do feel like a better person for it, and although counselling is an amazing option and should be considered you don’t necessarily need it. In the advice that I give, and the support we can give each other in the comments or over email, we’re going to make you into the best version of yourself you can possibly be!

So as I’ve mentioned to you all previously I have in the recent year suffered from anxiety which spiralled into a form of depression for me. If you met me now you would never guess it, and this is the problem with mental health, people don’t see past what you give them on the exterior. Even in my worst most darkest periods I continued to keep up the smile even though I was broken on the inside, it’s why I call myself the Broken Pearl because we all have our cracks and flaws and that’s what makes us beautiful.

For me my anxiety was a subconcsious thing for many years, looking back to when I was as young as 10 I would have panic attacks in the middle of lessons. The feeling of my lungs filling up with water, sweating, struggling to breathe, while somehow remaining that calm exterior, convincing myself this was normal and that it wasn’t something I should be concerned about. This is the problem, there isn’t enough recognition for mental health, if I had known from that age that this was anxiety I could have prevented rather than had the trouble of curing my really bad anxiety in my early adult-hood!

The first step to over-coming anxiety is not allowing yourself to be ignorant to it, it’s about having the awareness that you may need help and that this is something that needs to be fixed in a sense. However, your anxiety does not have to be a negative, it does not make you a broken person. As I said earlier when I related us all to broken pearls, our cracks aren’t flaws they make us into our perfect beautiful selves, you can make your anxiety into a positive.

Fuck it, I’m grateful for the fact I have and have had severe anxiety. There I said it. For me my anxiety has been a turning point in my life, it was a wake up call that I was on the wrong track and it turned me around, re-awakening me to new joys and a new perspective on life. I truly believe a third eye for me was opened through my anxiety, and I became connected to my spirituality. I will forever be grateful for that, and you will be too, the moment you recognise your anxiety and give into it, accept it, is the moment everything changes.

All my love,

The Broken Pearl

Make your aura glow!

Good morning beautiful world, how are we all today? You know this morning I realised how important it is to look after our bodies and listen to them when they’re trying to tell us something. So I went to the gym bright and early, was working out pretty hard and I was kinda in a rush because I’m on a timed schedule due to train times, and after doing a set of exercises I had an overwhelming feeling of nausea. It’s rare I ever really get this feeling, I mean I’m a little gym fanatic, my body is used to being pushed to its limits, but today it was telling me- nope I’ve had enough it’s time to stop now. Sometimes this is just the laziness within us telling us this, but I knew that my body really wasn’t up to it, I started to feel faint and dizzy and to stop that getting worse I left. Trust your body, don’t push yourself too hard, do what your body is telling you people.

Anyway, that wasn’t what my blog topic is about today, but if that was enough for you and you’ve learnt something that can benefit you that’s great and my jobs done! wisteria.jpeg

Today I wanted to talk to you all about aura’s. So after reading some Oprah Winfrey this morning (which I had stopped doing recently because I had lots of other things to get me writing in my journal) she talked about a mans near death experience, and how just as he was escaping the scene he described these sort of bright lights or auras leaving the bodies of those who had deceased. It was a sad story, a plane exploding, leading to many deaths and few escaping with their lives.

The whole concept of aura’s really stuck with him, and it has now really intrigued me. He explained how some aura’s shone brighter than others. To me this seemed as though the brightness or the aura is our soul leaving our body, and the brighter it shone the more goodness you have done and the more you have followed your soul in your life.

In pursuing love, and by listening to your soul (the little voice in your head which so many of us disregard), following the right feelings we are being guided to the light and our soul will shine brighter as a consequence. Perhaps our souls shine bright from doing good too? At least that’s what I would like to believe. Being empathetic and promoting positivity in everyday life will only help your soul shine brighter because you’re emitting aura postgood energy out to the Universe and to others. This is part of the reason I have fallen in love with volunteering, the whole concept of giving for nothing in return. It makes me feel good, and when I’m working I don’t complain, I relish in the joy of helping others and doing good.

Close your eyes, and envision this light within you, your soul fluttering beside your heart. How brightly would you say you have allowed your aura to shine? If you feel as though every day is becoming a chore and time seems to disappear with little time for you to do what you truly love, change that. If you feel as though your flame, the spark has gone out within you, RE-IGNITE! Find that energy, that love within you, seek gratitude and go after the right feelings. It’s never too late. I realised this when I began pursuing a career in Law at University, my soul wasn’t being fed what it really wanted, I wasn’t buzzing with energy and life and I certainly wasn’t emitting positive energy I was enveloped in darkness, my flame had certainly gone out. But as I just said, there’s always a way out, although it was challenging I changed my path and decided to change course which meant taking a year out. There’s always a way.

If you take anything from this blog post remember this:

The Universe is on your side, it want’s you to achieve your greatest desires and pursue what you love. Your soul deserves to shine bright within you. If you could see your soul how would it look? Would you be happy with it? 

Carpe diem people, keep your eyes bright and your souls even brighter.

All my love, 

HG

(The Broken Pearl)

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@ Hannah Grace      @Hannahzgracee