Pat yourself on the back

Hello beautiful readers, and a happy monday to you all! Who else remembers being told to do this at their primary school? After any little activity or small achievement we would be told to congratulate ourselves, appreciate that we had done well and then move forward.

Why am I talking about this? Because I feel like it’s become habit for so many of us to ignore the small achievements we’ve made, and only focus on the large and most ‘life-changing.’ The trouble is with this is that we’re left with a sense of never being satisfied, always wanting more, bigger, better.

Sometimes it can even stop us pursuing those things which we really want, our biggest dreams and goals because we believe they are so unattainable, out of reach. When really, if we’d payed attention and noted all the baby steps we were already making towards them then we would realise that we’re on our way there.

To be honest this is how I’ve been feeling recently, a little defeated you know. One of the ways I find helps me when I’m feeling a little lost, or feeling as though everything I desire is so far from my grasp is I remember all the little things I have achieved. Things such as starting this very blog! This was a major thing for me this year, yet I so often over-look it because it’s become part of routine now. I can tell you that setting up a website is not easy people, it was a mission and a half to do this, yet still I forget to pat myself on the back for it.

Another achievement is over-coming the worst of my anxiety. You know I’ve vowed to myself I will never allow myself to sink that low again, all the counselling, all the meditation, all the mind-training was worth it. Yet I still forget to pat myself on the back for it. If I could take myself back to how I was feeling in January of this year I know I was begging to feel this normal on a daily basis like I am now, rather than so up tight and miserable.

Whenever things are getting a little hard, whether you’re going through a break-up, mourning a loved one or are stressed for exams, remember to pat yourself on the back for the little things. If you’re struggling with a break-up, pat yourself on the back for the first day you’re strong enough not to cry. If you’re mourning someone you love, pat yourself on the back for the day you actually get out of bed. If you’re stressed for exams, pat yourself on the back for the that time you nailed that one practice paper.

Because the little things matter, heck, they matter the most, because if we didn’t appreciate them we wouldn’t be able to reach the bigger goals. Don’t overlook them or become blind to them, embrace them, and keep progressing.

All my love,

HG

Over-coming anxiety- part 5

Hello beautiful world, this is the final post I will be making on over-coming anxiety but if you want more posts like this just let me know in the comment section down below! I’ve been feeling very motivated recently, if you’ve read my last post you’d understand that I’m slowly coming to terms with living with uncertainty and not always having a plan. I just think that by putting all our hopes and dreams into one plan, one direction, if we come across bumps in the road or things don’t go as they ‘should have’ we get dissapointed and more sad than we should do. Personally I think that this was always part of the problem with my own anxiety, my awareness that this may be something I should work on has helped considerably in a recovery from something that got me down more than I realised at first.

So this final post is all about ensuring you’re loving yourself, and that you allow yourself the time you need to heal yourself. The process isn’t going to be over-night, and you will have your wobbles every now and then, but overall you’ll be a better person mentally and physically. Healing anxiety isn’t just about improving mental health, it’s about following your soul and changing your lifestyle for the better. It’s the reason I’m partly against taking medication for it, because in my opinion that’s more of a quick fix, instant help, that won’t heal you internally but give the false impression that you’re doing good. Of course if you’re really struggling and medication is what you need I encourage that! But in order to help yourself in the long-term you need to start getting honest with yourself, dig deep to discover where all this is stemming from, what is laying in your subconscious that is making you anxious?

Over-coming anxiety will be a steady process, and you’ll find a few hurdles along the way that may distract you from your end goal. The most important thing is not to fall and stay down. You pick yourself up every single freaking time and dust yourself off, keep moving, keep progressing, because that’s life! Life will throw hurdles at you, whether it’s in work or personal stuff, it’s going to happen, but you can’t use that as an exuse to stop the process of bettering yourself.

It’s like my breakup—- in case you didn’t realise this is what my The Broken Pearl blog post is about. That was a major hurdle for me, I was the one who did the breaking up but that didn’t make it much easier for me. I know I did the right thing, and I’m still glad I did it, I have no regrets. I gave myself 3 days to mourn and not do much at all, after that I had to start being productive again, and I stuck to it. Don’t wallow in pity and negativity, pick yourself up from that shit because you’re so much better than that. Allow yourself time, set a date when you need to get back on track and stick with it.

Have faith in yourself, if you’re not all for it it’s only going to make it harder for you. Believe you’ll overcome it and you will. I’m a firm believer in the Law of Attraction, the energy you put out to the world you receive. The way I envision it is, when you’re in a good mood and radiating good energy you have on a pair of glasses with lenses which only allow you to see love, colour and positivity. If you’re in a bad mood the negative spectacles come on and that’s all you’ll see… The thing we all forget is that we can change those glasses whenever we like you just have to change your perspective, change your mood, the world is only what you make it. Life is the dancer and you are the dance. Never forget that.

This is the post for you to come back to when you need to become motivated again, because you may need it. If I can do it you sure can, I beleive in youuuuuuuu. Let the journey commense.

All my love,

The Broken Pearl

YOU’RE WORTHY

So we all know how it is to feel worthless and useless right? If you haven’t you’re a very fortunate person and I envy you considerably. But often what we don’t realise is that the reason we feel worthless is due to the fact that we allow other people too much control over our emotions, we rely on their opinion of us to affirm our own opinion of ourselves… and that’s not good. 

This post today is about taking that control back, and never allowing anyone else’s opinion of you to topple your own, never allow anyone that pink plane windowpower over you. This is especially evident in relationships. How many young girls rely on some dirty trash of a guy’s opinion in order to feel fulfilled and good enough? Why should we allow someone the power to control how we feel? The answer is we should NOT. 

Recently for me after going through a breakup I allowed myself to become lower in self-worth because of this one dude I met like 3 times. This guy intimidated me, he was older, very ambitious and successful. Consequently I thought he was a rather arrogant person, which can obviously become unattractive when not in moderation. So this intimidation and feeling that he was better than me (since he’d been so successful) led to me believing that I had no worth and that everything I had made for myself through my blog and YouTube was useless. All this from meeting up with a guy 3 bloody times!!!

It’s like I forgot all about ‘Comparison is the thief of joy’ and that I control my own worth, no one else should be given that control. The problem was I allowed this dude the power to change my worth, making me forget how freaking amazing I am, making me doubtful and lowering my overall frequency. 

pink cloudsNow, I know I am not the only girl that has had this experience with boys that they’re seeing. If you’re feeling low and depressed due to a guy who isn’t showing or giving you the attention you so rightfully deserve, get rid of him, throw him in the trash. You and you alone set the bar for what you deserve. If you believe you deserve someone who is lazy with no ambition you’ll attract and accept people like that. You’re better than that, you deserve to set that bar as high as you can, and don’t let anyone convince you otherwise. Take a deep breath and remind yourself that you are a bad b*tch, an independent woman, who does not need a mans attention and appreciation to feel whole. 

I just feel like so many of us fall into this trap, subconsciously. I mean I would say I’m a pretty strong young lady and even I get sucked into this vicious circle. I think at the end of the day we all like the attention, but we deserve the best sort of attention, not the arse who isn’t giving you the love you deserve. 

Remember this ladies and gents, I think we all need to hear it sometimes. 

All my love, 

HG

(The Broken Pearl)